The remote work habit I didn't know I needed

I didn’t think much of 1-2-1s when I first heard about them. Standups and project meetings seemed enough. Turns out I was wrong.

The pandemic caught us unprepared

I remember when I worked from the office and the pandemic struck. We as a team had no clue how to tackle the communication challenges. I started feeling disconnected from the team.

What was worse for me: we were taking over a legacy project in a technology I wasn’t familiar with (good old Objective-C) which made it even tougher. There was no senior devs sitting 2 desks from me that I could ask for advice or have a quick pair up session.

I am not writing this to blame anyone. We all ended up in new circumstances we weren’t prepared for.

Joining a remote-first company

Then I joined a company with a remote-first culture which had the processes for remote work already in place.

One of the things that was new to me was team travel (recently described by my colleague Mikołaj, whom I work with on AiDoes.it - see his LinkedIn post). Another was 1-2-1: usually a bi-weekly meeting with a colleague, not necessarily from your team.

When I started I didn’t realize how important it was. I thought daily standups and other project related meetings suffice.

When I started talking to people outside my team

In the beginning 1-2-1s served a mentoring purpose for me. I had them with a team lead or engineering manager where they would guide my career, ask if everything’s OK or just have a chit-chat to get to know each other better.

With time I was advised to schedule meetings with people I do not work with on a daily basis. It was a great way to find out what was happening in other projects and exchange experiences.

I also found out about technical issues someone already solved that I was stuck on, or ideas for internal projects based on what other people were working on. Things you’d never hear about in a company-wide meeting.

“Oh, you’re working on that too! Great, I’ll just wait for you guys to finish and use it.”

The cooperation is at another level if you need to ask for help from John you’d spoken with about his recent holiday instead of “that person from Team X who works on Y.”

What I got wrong

I still struggle with keeping within the timeframe. I’d start with chit-chat and wouldn’t have time to discuss things I planned to discuss.

It depends on the person, but personally I get sidetracked easily, so having a list of items I want to discuss helps greatly.

Looking back, I wish I started earlier asking people outside my team.

How I run 1-2-1s

I would start with 30 minutes every two weeks. Depending on the nature of the meeting:

• If it’s more of a mentoring session, then I’d treat it as mentee time so they can choose what to talk about.
• If it’s more peer-to-peer, then maybe no need to discuss specific topics - it should come naturally.
• Bring a short list of things you want to discuss. I get sidetracked easily, and without it I’d spend the whole time on chit-chat and leave without covering what I planned.

What I’d tell myself back then

The pandemic caught me off guard, and I spent weeks feeling disconnected before things improved. Joining a remote-first company showed me that remote work doesn’t have to mean isolation, but only if you’re intentional about staying connected.

1-2-1s were the biggest surprise. I went from “standups are enough” to scheduling regular conversations with people across the company. The payoff was immediate: problems got unblocked faster, I learned about projects I didn’t know existed, and asking someone for help became personal instead of transactional.

If you’re remote and not doing 1-2-1s yet, start with one. Pick a colleague you don’t work with directly and schedule 30 minutes. You don’t need a process or a framework. Just talk.